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Anger and punishment?
Jul. 23rd, 2012 11:14 pmA lover of mine disappeared about 5 weeks ago and showed up today. I noticed that not only was I a bit angry (he failed to show up for a date, no call, no email, no text) and I heard nothing all this time.
When I saw the text today I was not just angry, but I wanted to punish him. I wanted to make him feel bad for making me feel bad.
What it made me realize is that I put the locus of my emotions outside of myself still sometimes. And that's not what I want to be doing.
What I want to do is to be responsible for my emotions and reactions. And I often am. I don't know if it's just that the story that other people make can make me angry is such a popular story or something else. I just want to bookmark this and open up conversation to see if others have had this reactions and if you have any insight?
When I saw the text today I was not just angry, but I wanted to punish him. I wanted to make him feel bad for making me feel bad.
What it made me realize is that I put the locus of my emotions outside of myself still sometimes. And that's not what I want to be doing.
What I want to do is to be responsible for my emotions and reactions. And I often am. I don't know if it's just that the story that other people make can make me angry is such a popular story or something else. I just want to bookmark this and open up conversation to see if others have had this reactions and if you have any insight?
